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Walter Kirn Quotes
American
-
Novelist
August 3, 1962
A writer who isn't writing is asking for trouble.
Walter Kirn
Who
Trouble
Writing
Asking
Writer
Ask Jeeves! Who ever used that thing? College freshmen to find out who Goethe was - that's it.
Walter Kirn
Who
Find
College
Out
Freshmen
Goethe
Ask
Ever
Thing
Used
The room-service Caesar salads with soggy croutons, the distant relatives who show up at readings pitching weird, far-fetched investment schemes, the fans who have you sign a book to 'Cathy' and then tell you, 'No, it's Kathy with a K' - it gets challenging after a while. It tests your stamina.
Walter Kirn
You
Weird
Your
Who
Caesar
Cathy
Challenging
Distant
Far-Fetched
Investment
Pitching
Readings
Relatives
Salads
Schemes
Sign
Stamina
Tests
After
Book
Fans
Gets
Show
Tell
Then
Up
While
I've been around - having gone to Princeton, and I went to Oxford after that - some pretty fancy characters in my life. And they're just as nutty as the rest of us - sometimes worse.
Walter Kirn
Life
My Life
Rest
Sometimes
Fancy
Nutty
Oxford
Princeton
Worse
After
Around
Been
Characters
Gone
Having
Just
Pretty
Some
Us
I grew up in a little town in Minnesota, 500 people. I went out to Princeton, and I wasn't very well-accepted out there by the fancy folks of Princeton University, I felt. I came away bruised and feeling rejected.
Walter Kirn
People
Feeling
University
Little
Bruised
Fancy
Folks
Little Town
Minnesota
Princeton
Rejected
Town
I Came
Away
Came
Felt
Grew
Out
Up
Very
There are two sides to me. One is the writer. That's a savage person who looks at everything as a story and, you know, wants to use real life in his books. The other part is the Midwesterner, who, you know, wants to say nice things about people and be polite.
Walter Kirn
Life
Me
You
People
Nice Things
Polite
Real Life
Savage
Sides
About
Books
Everything
His
Know
Looks
Nice
Other
Part
Person
Real
Say
Story
Things
Two
Use
Wants
Who
Writer
At college, I wanted to be a poet. I liked the extremely concentrated language, the atmosphere of otherworldliness.
Walter Kirn
Language
College
Atmosphere
Poet
Concentrated
Extremely
Liked
Wanted
I studied English at Princeton in the early eighties in what I consider a period of high obscurity. Professors and students ran around discussing the work of critics and philosophers that I doubt they'd read or understood.
Walter Kirn
Work
Doubt
High
Critics
Discussing
Eighties
Obscurity
Period
Philosophers
Princeton
Professors
Ran
Students
Studied
Understood
Around
Consider
Early
English
Read
I'm a magpie in my fiction, taking whatever looks shiny and curious to line the nest of my story.
Walter Kirn
Nest
Curious
Looks
Story
Fiction
Shiny
Line
Taking
Whatever
I have very specific advice for aspiring writers: go to New York. And if you can't go to New York, go to the place that represents New York to you, where the standards for writing are high, there are other people who share your dreams, and where you can talk, talk, talk about your interests.
Walter Kirn
Dreams
You
People
New
Advice
Aspiring
Interests
Represents
Specific
Standards
Your Dreams
About
Go
High
New York
Other
Place
Share
Talk
Very
Where
Who
Writers
Writing
York
Your
When we have a favorite writer, it's always the places where they grew up, lived, worked, and that they recreated on the page that we most want to visit and commune with. Faulkner's Mississippi, Raymond Chandler's Los Angeles, etc. The mind of the reader longs to be somewhere, not just anywhere, and certainly not nowhere.
Walter Kirn
I love reference books, especially collections of memorable quotations, world almanacs, and atlases. Facts to me are like candy or popcorn, small, tasty delights, and I like to gorge on them now and then.
Walter Kirn
Love
Me
World
Facts
Candy
Collections
Delights
Memorable
Now And Then
Popcorn
Quotations
Reference
Tasty
Books
I Love
Like
Now
Small
Them
Then
Top 10
Walter Kirn
Quotes
View the list
I say 'here's the thing' a lot, both to alert people that I'm about to say something important and to give myself a moment to figure out what that important thing might be, because my head is so often completely empty.
Walter Kirn
Myself
People
Moment
Important
Alert
Empty
Important Thing
About
Because
Both
Figure
Give
Head
Here
Lot
Might
Often
Out
Say
Something
Thing
My mother used to push 'Wuthering Heights' on me as a boy, and I sensed from her breathy description of the story that it would make me laugh. I have no plans to find out if this is true.
Walter Kirn
Mother
Me
Boy
Laugh
Description
Heights
Make Me Laugh
Plans
Push
Sensed
Find
Her
Make
Out
Story
True
Used
Would
Once you realize just the sort of glut of books that exists out there, it does become incumbent on you not to add to it unless you have a damn good reason.
Walter Kirn
Good
You
Damn
Reason
Add
Exists
Glut
Good Reason
Incumbent
Become
Books
Does
Just
Once
Out
Realize
Sort
Unless
I like to think that I could praise the good book of someone I personally dislike. I try not to comment on the person, to be insulting, but I have no trouble being insulting to the work.
Walter Kirn
Work
Good
Think
Praise
Comment
Dislike
Good Book
Insulting
Personally
Trouble
Being
Book
Could
Like
Person
Someone
Try
I think of myself as writing realist American fiction. 'Cynical but hopeful' wouldn't be the worst thing I've ever been called.
Walter Kirn
Myself
Think
Writing
American
Cynical
Fiction
Hopeful
Realist
Worst Thing
Been
Ever
I Think
Thing
Worst
I think people get a sense of possibility when they're on a plane, even romantic possibility, wondering if the perfect person is going to sit down next to them or something.
Walter Kirn
People
Romantic
Think
Next
Perfect Person
Plane
Possibility
Wondering
Down
Even
Get
Going
I Think
Perfect
Person
Sense
Sit
Something
Them
I've noticed that the few times I've traveled first class myself, you've already got your drink, and your coat has been taken by the time the rest of the passengers file on, and it's hard not to feel sorry for them. They're sort of trooping past you like cows to slaughter and you're sitting there in your, you know, wide-body seat.
Walter Kirn
We're on Twitter with one side of our personality, and Facebook with another, and LinkedIn with another side of our personality, and we're toggling between them. That's just a version of what an impostor does: shifting from one side of their personality to another with lightning speed.
Walter Kirn
Personality
Lightning
Speed
Just
Facebook
LinkedIn
Shifting
Twitter
Version
Another
Between
Does
Our
Side
Them
A sociopath doesn't warm up their environment, doesn't make it cozy. They don't have to; when they're not performing, when they're not manipulating, when they're all alone, there's nothing.
Walter Kirn
Alone
Nothing
Environment
Cozy
Manipulating
Performing
Warm
Make
Up
Realize that the game of life is the game of, to some extent, being taken advantage of by people who make a science of it. Whether they are in government or personal life or in business, they're everywhere.
Walter Kirn
Life
Science
People
Game
Advantage
Everywhere
Extent
Personal Life
Being
Business
Government
Make
Personal
Realize
Some
Taken
Whether
Who
What is it in people, or just in people like me, that would rather let a lie go by, would rather wish it away or minimize it, than point it out and cause the liar embarrassment?
Walter Kirn
Me
People
Liar
Go
Embarrassment
Lie
Minimize
Away
Cause
Just
Like
Out
Point
Rather
Than
Wish
Would
The Bible has been through millions of rounds of exegesis and interpretation, but it hasn't been until quite recently that it's been taken as the absolute truth, to the point where people expect it to inform ideas about biology and life on this planet.
Walter Kirn
Life
Truth
People
Bible
Absolute
Absolute Truth
Biology
Inform
Interpretation
Millions
Planet
Recently
Rounds
About
Been
Expect
Has-Been
Ideas
Point
Quite
Taken
Through
Until
Where
Every generation looks at literature through the lens of their own experience, but with the Bible, everyone gets apprehensive and thinks it'll be too stuffy.
Walter Kirn
Experience
Bible
Generation
Looks
Apprehensive
Lens
Literature
Thinks
Every
Everyone
Gets
Own
Through
Too
When I was writing about the Republican primaries, it was as though the Bible was a black box that people reached into to pull out edicts and prejudices and rules and opinions, and I wish they had fact-checked it! Especially Rick Santorum.
Walter Kirn
People
Bible
Black
Wish
Box
Opinions
Prejudices
Pull
Reached
Republican
Rick
Rules
I Wish
About
Had
Out
Though
Writing
God is a freaking character, with enough foibles, tantrums, and paradoxical behaviors to supply a thousand screenplays. But who do you cast?
Walter Kirn
God
You
Character
Who
Behaviors
Cast
Paradoxical
Screenplays
Supply
Tantrums
Thousand
Enough
A writer is someone who tells you one thing so someday he can tell his readers another thing: what he was thinking but declined to say, or what he would have thought had he been wiser. A writer turns his life into material, and if you're in his life, he uses yours, too.
Walter Kirn
Life
You
Thinking
Who
Declined
Material
Readers
Someday
Tells
Turns
Uses
Wiser
Yours
Another
Been
Had
He
His
One Thing
Say
Someone
Tell
Thing
Thought
Too
Would
Writer
The least sexy city is Los Angeles. And it poses as the most sexy. As you grow up, L.A. is being sold to you as home of the bikini-clad party girls. And then you get there, and it's full of very goal-oriented, yoga-obsessed careerists.
Walter Kirn
Sexy
You
Home
City
Angeles
Grow Up
Los
Los Angeles
Poses
Sold
Being
Full
Get
Girl
Grow
Least
Most
Party
Then
Up
Very
I remember the first time I went to Italy when I was eighteen, I was in Florence and there were all these eighteen, nineteen, twenty-year-olds gliding past on Vespas with crinkly, long, hair, and I thought I was on the set of a movie. I couldn't believe that this was going on and I hadn't known about it before. I was flabbergasted.
Walter Kirn
Long
Time
Past
Believe
Eighteen
First Time
Florence
Gliding
Italy
Long Hair
Nineteen
About
Before
First
Going
Hair
I Remember
Known
Movie
Remember
Set
Thought
Were
I had the impression from reading English literature that British women were great beauties, and I only had seen Julie Christie, and she was gorgeous and sexy. I don't know whether it was just my taste, but when I got to London, I went two years without seeing a truly attractive woman. A lot of near misses.
Walter Kirn
We want to believe that we're invulnerable, and that people who get tricked deserve it. Well, they don't. And someday the arrogant types who mock the gullible are likely to get their turn to wear the dunce cap.
Walter Kirn
People
Believe
Who
Cap
Arrogant
Deserve
Dunce
Gullible
Likely
Mock
Someday
Tricked
Types
Get
Turn
Want
Wear
Well
I'd assumed that a deal was a deal when Princeton admitted me, but I was wrong. The price of getting in - to the university itself, and to the great world it promised to open up - was an endless dunning for nebulous services that weren't included in the initial quote.
Walter Kirn
Me
Great
World
Getting
Admitted
Assumed
Endless
Included
Initial
Price
Princeton
Promised
Quote
Services
University
Deal
Itself
Open
Up
Were
Wrong
In fourth grade, I learned that reading was serious business, not just a pleasant way to pass the time, and that like medicine or engineering, it had a definite, valuable purpose: to foster 'comprehension.'
Walter Kirn
Time
Business
Way
Purpose
Comprehension
Definite
Engineering
Foster
Fourth
Grade
Medicine
Pass
Pleasant
Valuable
Had
Just
Learned
Like
Reading
Serious
A president, like a college freshman, can't know in advance which questions he'll have to answer or what topics he'll have to master. He has to be flexible, supple, and responsive. He has to be comfortable with multiple-choice.
Walter Kirn
Know
Like
Questions
College
Advance
Answer
Flexible
Freshman
Master
Responsive
Supple
Topics
Comfortable
He
President
Which
Cross the wrong state border with your gun, or wake up one morning to new legislation or a new presidential executive order, and suddenly you're the bad guy, not the good guy. No wonder some gun owners seem so touchy; they feel, at some level, like criminals in waiting.
Walter Kirn
Size has nothing to do with literature. All legs are long enough to touch the ground, and all books are big enough to fill their covers.
Walter Kirn
Long
Nothing
Enough
Big
Big Enough
Covers
Fill
Ground
Legs
Literature
Size
Touch
Books
However old-fashioned and right-wing this may sound, the American genius for language lies in understatement, in saying things simply, pointedly and quickly, and in making new and clean and swift what otherwise might be ponderous, round and slow.
Walter Kirn
May
New
Genius
Language
Clean
However
Lies
Old-Fashioned
Otherwise
Quickly
Right-Wing
Round
Slow
Swift
Understatement
American
Making
Might
Saying
Simply
Sound
Things
Novelists who pretend to understand what keeps them scribbling are really just guessing. A profound, unmet childish need to be acknowledged? Maybe. It hardly matters, though. The termite that asks itself why it keeps chewing risks becoming sluggish and inefficient, as does the writer who grows self-conscious in the middle of chapter five.
Walter Kirn
Stopping to think is fine for characters, but not for their creators. They have to work.
Walter Kirn
Work
Think
Fine
Stopping
Creators
Characters
My primary ambition is to be a fiction writer... Being a critic wasn't an aspiration of mine.
Walter Kirn
Ambition
Being
Mine
Writer
Aspiration
Critic
Fiction
Fiction Writer
Primary
According to the perverse aesthetics of artistic guilty pleasure, certain books and movies are so bad - so crudely conceived, despicably motivated and atrociously executed - that they're actually rather good.
Walter Kirn
Good
Bad
Movies
Guilty
According
Aesthetic
Artistic
Conceived
Executed
Guilty Pleasure
Motivated
Perverse
Pleasure
Actually
Books
Certain
Rather
I've come to learn that the determined and gifted and genuine sociopath has far more power to deceive than we realize.
Walter Kirn
Power
More
Genuine
Realize
Deceive
Determined
Gifted
More Power
Come
Far
Learn
Than
The reason con artists get away with what they get away with is, their victims are ashamed of their own blindness and their own gullibility, and they tend to just quietly go away.
Walter Kirn
Go
Own
Reason
Just
Ashamed
Blindness
Con
Go Away
Quietly
Victims
Artists
Away
Get
Tend
In the age of networked everything, life moves sideways and covers lots of ground while barely touching the earth.
Walter Kirn
Life
Age
Earth
Everything
Barely
Covers
Ground
Lots
Moves
Sideways
Touching
While
I review books as a day job, and through the years I've come to view the contemporary memoir as, almost always, a saga of victimization, sometimes by others, sometimes by the self, and sometimes by illness or misfortune, leading, like clockwork, to healing and redemption.
Walter Kirn
Day
View
Self
Sometimes
Clockwork
Contemporary
Day Job
Healing
Illness
Leading
Memoir
Misfortune
Redemption
Review
Saga
Victimization
Almost
Always
Books
Come
Job
Like
Others
Through
Years
To young people born under the weird planet of the SAT, intelligence was equated with agility, with raw acuity. It produced a certain sort of person of which I was a typical specimen: the mental contortionist, able to rise to almost every challenge placed before him, except the challenge of real self-knowledge.
Walter Kirn
The strange anthropological lesson of social media is that human beings, if given a choice, often prefer to socialize alone.
Walter Kirn
Alone
Social Media
Strange
Media
Beings
Human Beings
Lesson
Prefer
Socialize
Choice
Given
Human
Often
Social
Since the founding of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other mainstays of what technology writers have come to call 'the social Web' or 'Web 2.0,' a sizable portion of humanity has learned to be together while apart, sacrificing intimacy for control and spontaneity for predictability.
Walter Kirn
Technology
Together
Humanity
Control
Apart
Facebook
Founding
Instagram
Intimacy
Portion
Predictability
Sacrificing
Spontaneity
Twitter
Web
Call
Come
Learned
Other
Since
Social
While
Writers
On the Web, we can be whoever we wish to be, editing the face we show to others in ways that aren't possible in physical space. We can also fine-tune the complexity and depth of our interactions and relationships.
Walter Kirn
Face
Editing
Space
Wish
Complexity
Depth
Interactions
Relationships
Web
Whoever
Also
Others
Our
Physical
Possible
Show
Ways
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